I have learnt to just adapt and be very prepared for my stoma and this has helped to ease any worry I may have had. One of the first things I did when I was undergoing my first set of chemotherapy was look for a new job. I had just left teaching but wanted the financial security of a job again. I don’t know how I managed it, but in the short period I was at home between my hospital stay with chemotherapy induced colitis and the surgery to remove the tumour, I managed to find a brilliant job. One which was, and still is, understanding of what was happening and happy to be flexible for me.

Only 3 weeks after surgery there was an offer of a training course for this new job. There was no pressure for me to go – it definitely wasn’t mandatory, and I think my boss thought I was daft, but I was craving that sense of normality. I didn’t want to feel like a victim of the cancer and the stoma operation. Although I was worried it was too soon I also really wanted to do it. My family encouraged me, and I decided to go for it.

It involved a car journey then public transport with 3 new colleagues – plus a small amount of walking just to get to the venue. When you’re going through chemotherapy and recovery from surgery, the exhaustion can be overwhelming and I’d always make sure to rest where possible, so this was a lot for me – I was missing out on my naps! But I was so proud I did it! Plus, I changed my bag in a public toilet successfully (not a disabled facility either). Looking back, I could have said no, but for me personally overcoming that fear early on really helped me see I can do it, I don’t have to be held back.

For this trip, and for those first few months, I definitely took out lots of extra bags and clothes with me – just in case. It’s a bit like having a baby, for the first 6 months or so you’ve a huge bag with you to cover any eventuality, then you get a bit more confident, realise things happen but you can cope. You then can reduce what you need out with you. I still have an extra pair of leggings in my bag though, I’ve never needed them but they’re a comfort to have.

I am also really vocal about my stoma; I love meeting someone else who has been through a similar experience to me. At a recent event I got chatting to a stranger and he started to explain it was his first time out in a year, post bowel cancer and stoma surgery. I was delighted to chat to him and share similar experiences. Everyone’s journey is their own, you do it in your own time, but I find sharing those stories can be an encouragement and you feel an instant connection in doing so. Being brave is really important during the whole journey.

Summa